28 March, 2013

Milking The Goatmachine: Stallzeit – new album


Ever inspired and hugely popular in at least one Central European country - a phenomenon really,  MILKING THE GOATMACHINE's new album, ‘Stallzeit’, is due out tomorrow, March 29th, 2013, on NoiseArt Records. Immediately order ‘Stallzeit’ here (NoiseArt Records) and at Amazon's:
“With ‘Stallzeit’ the band sets new standards,” [the press release tells us] An amazing concept album. The killer production really nails it to the point, it´s a hard-slamming, riff-sh*tting, grind shouting record with a massive wall of guitars, goatdowns, mosh parts and ferocity. A true fest of grind/death with a twist of nonsense and craziness, the trademark of them goats]

More than just goat-like creatures, in actual truth it’s not just an image; they’ve descended from Planet GoatEborg with the intention of dominating the planet Earth, grinding-wise. They have come to spread the “goatgrind”, a mixture of grind, crust, milk, horns, sheds, death and love. MILKING THE GOATMACHINE are apparently quite famous on their planet of origin where, we are told, the music scene is “still fine”. Their descend occurred in 2009 when they landed in Goataragua, Chile. Noise & Stuff cannot independently verify the following claim, but reportedly a farmer there gave them a shed. And, after a couple of shots of “Udder-Booze”, I would guess, Anstalt Records signed the creatures. And the beasts released their first chronicle, ‘Back From The Goats’, that same fatal year. Now, this is very important and should be known: ‘Back From The Goats’ was a concept album; it told an important story, as narrated by one of the goat-fathers. Read and be awed:
“A guy has been dismissed by his girl. One night he passed by this huge field, all drunk of course, because of his grief and sadness. Shit happens. Not far away he saw a goat barn where he walked in and crushed on a pregnant nanny goat. They immediately fell in love and made exactly that all night long. In the morning of the very next day, the guy recognized he had connated with the nanny goat while she was giving birth to her child, a goat. Although the farmer thought this guy was one ugly bastard, he took him to his farm to milk him. Shortly after that the farmer casted him out again because of his sour milk and the fact that the flock would not accept him. Shit happens. That led the guy to the point where he ran amok, impaling the farmer and the rest of the flock with his horns. After that he made his way back to town to kill his ex-girlfriend and the rest of the population by squirting them to death with his sour milk. Shit happens.”
They seem to reside in Germany these days, them goats. As expected, NoiseArt Records had fallen for their otherworldly, country charm and MILKING THE GOATMACHINE released yet another concept album in November 2010. Titled ‘Seven…A Dinner For One’, the record was about “the wolf and the seven kids”, containing tracks as ‘Like A Goatmachine’, apparently a remake of James Brown's classic ‘Like A Sex Machine’. At least they didn’t tackle Eros Ramazzoti whom they cite as an influence (along with NAPALM DEATH, DEVOURMENT, NAILBOMB, classic Japanese music and Albano and Romina Power, heh). In 2011, the goats delivered another concept album called ‘Clockwork Udder’of which I know nothing because I haven’t been paying attention, but of which success I have no doubt.
MILKING THE GOATMACHINE features: Goatfreed Udder – guitar and bass (live guitar), Goatleeb Udder – vocals, drums, guitar and bass (live vocals and drums), Steve Shedaway - live bass and Lazarus Hoove - live guitar

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